Thank You Notes 101

Hello Our Beautiful Readers!

Excited about your engagement and upcoming wedding…so are your friends and family! All of this excitement puts them in the gift giving spirit! Who doesn’t love to open a package and find a wonderful surprise inside! Remember gift givers are just as excited to receive a thank you note not letting them know you received their gift but also how much you love it. A hand-written thank you is such a lovely gesture to let them know how much you appreciate their gift. When should you write thank you notes? Contrary to popular belief, there is not a year’s grace period in which to write thank you notes.  According to Emily Post, all thank-you notes should be written within three months of the receipt of the gift. Ideally, a response should be written on the day you receive a wedding gift. If that’s not possible, set a daily goal. It’s a lot easier to write three or four notes a day than to have to write a hundred notes in a month after the wedding!

We realize writing thank you notes can seem a little daunting so we thought we would share a few dos and don’ts to help you write a beautiful, timely note.   

  • Do handwrite your notes.
  • Do write a personal note and make reference to the person as well as the gift, like “Dear Joe, Thank you for the wine glasses we look forward to toasting our love for years to come!”
  • Do be excited, but be careful not to get carried away with enthusiasm. Avoid saying a gift is spectacular unless you actually feel this way.
  • Do explain how you will use a gift of money.
  • Do use stationery. Don’t use fill in the blank cards or pre-printed cards.
  • Do call to acknowledge a gift if you can’t write a thank you note immediately but still follow up with a personalized note within a few days.
  • Do send individual notes to each person who contributed to a group gift.
  • Don’t post a thank you on your wedding web site instead of sending a personal note.
  • Don’t mention that you plan to return a gift or that you are dissatisfied in any way.
  • Don’t include wedding photos or use photo cards if it will delay sending the note. If you have a cute pic of the two of you on your wedding day with a thank you sign, make sure to check with your photographer to see if they can get this one to you right away.
  • Don’t use being late writing thank you notes as a reason not to write them. Even if you are still writing them after your first anniversary, write and send them.

During this time of celebration, remember thank you notes are not only sent to those who give a gift but also to those who helped or participated in your celebration. Here’s a list of who should receive a thank you note.  

  • Anyone who gives you an engagement, shower or wedding gift, even if you have thanked them in person.
  • Anyone who gives a gift of money: cash, checks, contributions to savings accounts, and donations to charities. Mentioning the amount is optional, but it does let the person know the correct amount was received. You should mention what you plan to do with the money.
  • Your attendants. A warm personal note attached to your gifts to your attendants will let them know how much you appreciate their efforts and support on your behalf.
  • Host or hostesses of parties and showers in your honor.
  • People who house or entertain your wedding guests. A note and a small gift should be sent to anyone who houses or entertains out-of-town wedding guests.
  • People who do kindnesses for you. The neighbor who accepts delivery of your gifts when you are at work; the cousin who supervises the parking at the reception – anyone who assists you before, during or after your wedding.
  • Suppliers and vendors. You don’t have to write everyone you hire for services, but anyone who exceeds your expectations will appreciate a courteous note of thanks.
  • Your parents or whoever is hosting your wedding.

Hopefully these tips will help make the task of writing thank you notes a bit easier. Overwhelmed with other wedding tasks, don’t let the pressure get to you. We can help!

Until next week our beautiful readers!